Great job


[ Responses ] [ Post a Response ] [ Learning Center ]

Posted by Michele Peters on May 25, 19102 at 16:10:29:

In Reply to: Topic 11 posted by Yuka on May 24, 19102 at 11:39:03:

Your essay is well structured and well thought out. You give good support for your reasons and have a good command of English.

Some suggestions:


players graduated from my universities,
...my university

not only baseball fans but only ordinary people know my universities.
not only...but also...know my university

impression people have on my
...of my...

was not the exception to use the gym.

have a party, drinking and singing,
have a party, and drink and sing


These examples clearly shows
These examples clearly show

that spending as much money on students’ sports activities AS on libraries

advantages such as the increase of universities’ celebrity and the improvement in students’ health as well as relationship.
the university's increased notarity, improvement of students' health, as well as better relationships among students.


Responses:



Post a Response

Name:
Subject:

Comments:


[ Responses ] [ Post a Response ] [ Learning Center ]